Everyone has a natural or innate response to conflict. While we may choose to not engage in a conflict, we feel our emotional response to it nevertheless. The more aware we are of our natural tendencies, the more effectively we can manage them.
Most people send powerful indicators that something is bothering them before an actual conflict or challenging situation arises.
Challenging situations often occur because underlying issues are not addressed quickly or thoroughly. They tend to fester and show up passive-aggressively with nuances unconnected to the original issue.
It’s easy to get “fired up” or emotional about conflict. We arrive at most conflicting situations with our own set of facts, assumptions, feelings, and emotions. Thus, it’s common to over-estimate the intensity.
It’s tempting to “help” others by offering advice on resolving conflict (doing the work for them). The challenge with this approach is that, once you “take care of it,” they are likely to assume you’ll resolve all subsequent issues.
Managers are tasked with helping team members excel in their jobs. Key deliverables include: (1) hiring top performers; (2) articulating clear standards and expectations; (3) offering powerful performance feedback; (4) holding coaching conversations; and (5) dismissing nonperformers and poor fits.
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